Hi, my name is Deric Brazill and this is my writings on subjects. I'm no rapscallion or anything at all. If you want to you can read my writings on subjects if you have free time. If you want to argue with me or call me names then please comment. Negative feedback is very welcome...I love dat shit.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

On Civil Disobedience...

Montreal Student Protest
Lots of students filling the streets this week in Montreal to protest tuition hikes. Yes, it's annoying that they are non-violently protesting and blocking streets off...but I can't be mad at them because I know that non-violent civil disobedience is one of the major factors that made Canada what it is today, and although it is a little annoying, I respect the students.

Canada has a long history of non-violent civil disobedience and it's pretty interesting.

History of Canadian Civil Disobedience

This got really big in Canada after World War I, when all the veterans came back bloodied, tired, and broken...to nothing. They were thanked for "Fighting for Freedom" and then forgotten about. Out of the 500,000 (est.) that returned home from WW1 many were disfigured or amputated, and a person with no arms has no chance of finding a job.


"Returning soldiers were angry. They had risked their lives for their country and now were returning to economic chaos. They had great difficulty finding jobs. They sometimes saw them occupied by immigrants. They bristled at annual inflation rates of about forty percent. They heard tales of people who had profited immensely from the war. " 

(http://canadachannel.ca/HCO/index.php/1._Strikes_and_Labour_Disputes_1918-1920)


It's hard to find a job when you have no legs...
People were starting to notice that maybe World War I was more about sending poor people to die off and making rich people more "war-bucks" than it was about "freedom" or some bullshit word...and so they got really really mad.

You can search "Winnipeg General Strike" or "On-to-Ottawa Trek"  for some good examples, or read through the link after the quote mentioned above...but to sum it up, Canadians protested like crazy and won all of the gains we take for granted today. All the social gains we have today were won from the powerful elite class by unions, veterans, and regular folks who practiced civil disobedience in the streets. That is not mentioned very often, in fact, usually when they talk about something we have in Canada they tell us it was given to us from an elite, like a God giving his peons something.

Take medicare for instance, in the interest of the history of medicare, we are told a horribly sappy story about how Tommy Douglas was once treated for free by a doctor and he decided that one day he will give everyone free health care. This is bullshit, Douglas was a crazy Christian preacher who wrote essays in support of eugenics and establishing a "Canadian Master Race." This crazy fool didn't just hand Canadians health care like some sort of God. Real Canadians took to the streets and fought for these gains.

Similarly in the U.S.A. veterans came home to nothing as well, and at some point must have said to themselves "fuck this shit, I went to kill other poor folks over the pond for what? To come home and live in the fucking street? Fuck this."  In 1932, a group of 17,000 veterans (plus their families and supporters, which in turn made the group total about 43,000 people) marched on the White House demanding compensation and a better life. This protest did not sit well with the Americans in power at the time and they ordered the protesters removed, President Herbert Hoover told the guards to use force if necessary and two veterans were shot and killed by police. So basically, two people who went to "die for their country" did indeed die for their country...but in their country and by their country. That's fucked up. (see: "Bonus Army" for details)

Civil Disobedience All-Stars

NVCD Icons of Yesteryear
The two most iconic faces of non-violent civil disobedience are Gandhi, and Martin Luther King Jr.

If you are interested in knowing about these two men and their methods please by all means use the power of the internet and research them. Putting their names into a search engine will give you all you need to know about them...also having King's "I Have a Dream" book in your library (either print or digital) is a must have.

(I might fill this blog out more after, but that's the basic reason I'm not gonna hate on the students for blocking off the roads even if it is annoying. It's good to keep pressure on your government.)


Ammendment (May 27, 2012:)

After 100 days of greasy students and crazy cops fooling around in the streets, it might be time to end this silliness.

Think about this...

As more US and UK universities are making their research and curriculum available for widespread free use online (example: http://webcast.berkeley.edu/)...it looks like the whole face of education is changing.

Michael Geist argues that Canada should catch up to the US and UK on this matter: (http://www.thestar.com/business/article/1177735--is-canada-lagging-behind-in-online-education)

For the record, a full year ago I wrote about free internet education in my blog: (http://writtting-d.blogspot.com/2011/05/free-educationget-it-while-its-hot-and.html) 

Online free education is really good, you can pause the lecture (to open a new tab and search for a term you didn't understand), you can rewind it to see a part over again that you didn't quite get. It's so convienient and free.
 

Right now, for instance, I'm watching lectures on computer programming as presented by the notorious mutha fuckin' Paul N. Hilfinger.

(http://webcast.berkeley.edu/playlist#c,s,All,EE65657BC5C79469)

...and it's FOR FREE! You can do this for any subject! You people are fighting for an ancient educational model that is going extinct fast.
It's pointless...

Monday, March 5, 2012

One of the weirdest dreams I've ever had...

The following is a dream I wish to relate to you, it is without a doubt one of the top five weirdest dreams I've ever experienced while sleeping...

I had this dream in the summer of 1996, a day or so after the movie Space Jam came out. I remember it was around the time Space Jam came out, because the dream I had the night before, was about seeing Space Jam in the theatre and loving it even though I would not see Space Jam in real life until it came out on video (but I did indeed end up enjoying it like my dream had predicted). I will break the dream down into sections to avoid jumbling it all up, firstly here is a detailed description of my dream (the one I had the night after the Space Jam Dream) as best as I can remember it...

The Dream Itself...

Ok listen...

I was at this beautiful European ski lodge (it must've been in Sweden or suchlike a place) and it was just me in the hotel room. There was a fire going in the fireplace, and a distant sound of water hitting tiles that I could hear. I made my way over the the bathroom to see what the running water sound was and as I suspected someone or something was taking a shower.

The bathroom was steamy and humid, and I could make out the silhouette of a female woman in the shower. She was lathering her self up with soap and I could tell she was quite shapely. I knew that there was a naked lady in the shower and I knew she was really hot. She sensed my presence and she began talking to me,

Naked Lady: "Who is it?"
Me: "It's just me. Who are you?"
Naked Lady: "Rula Lensca!"

Rula Lenska !!!
Whoa! It wasn't just any naked lady taking a shower in there, it was Polish/British actress Rula Lenska! I could tell from her body that she was in her peak 70's form too, not old or anything. Rula told me to enter into the shower, I was nervous because I was a big virgin in 1996...but I summoned up the courage to walk over to the shower door and open it. As I opened the door I knew something was really wrong, when the steam settled and I could make out what she looked like...I noticed that she was indeed wet and lathered up with soapy suds but...SHE HAD ALL OF HER CLOTHES ON!

At that moment I figured out that this wasn't even a sex dream but just a regular dream. I asked her why she was showering with all of her clothes on but she would not tell me, instead she insisted that she had vital information which held great importance to the well being of the future and that I must know about it.

She went on to explain to me her past, and how she was not really British or Polish...but what she called a "Volcanian." Apparently, hundreds of thousands of years ago, there existed a race of men who left their tribe to live in a great big volcano. These men were able to withstand immense heat and she told me they even took baths in lava! Sadly, when it came time for the eldest men of the tribe to mate, no women would bang with them because they were too sweaty and stinky from living in the volcano for so long. Rula explained to me that for their genes to be passed on to the next generation these volcano men chose to round up ostriches and impregnate them instead. The children produced were called Volcanians.

She told me that she was a descendent of the volcano men and the ostriches they banged, and that's the reason why she had such long beautiful legs and fiery red hair. The fire that surged through her veins held with it the knowledge of past, present, and of future.

I didn't know why she was telling me all this silliness but it was intriguing none the less. Next she took my hand and led me into the adjacent room in the ski lodge where she proceeded to sit down on a very nice chair with her soaking wet clothes that she had been showering in.

She then told me that most of the Volcanians had died out and only a few were left (identified by their fiery red hair and long sexy legs). Their tribe was subjugated and virtually wiped out by a neighboring tribe known as the "Aristocrats." The Aristocrats were awful people who chose never to work but just lie, cheat, steal, and deceive the honest folks around them. They deceived her ancestors out of their land and belongings.

Rula explained to me that I belong to a tribe called "humans" and that the battle between Humans and Aristocrats will be a long and drawn out one. She told me that as one of the last remaining Volcanians, she wanted to help humans in their battle against the Aristocrats.

She took an old book off of the mantle above the fireplace and handed it to me. She said,


"Within the pages of this text lies the divine stratagems to defeat the Aristocrats. It is veiled in vague language and puzzles that will take years to decipher. Do not ask why I present the answers to you in a way that is insanely difficult to understand...for it is the way of the Volcanians..."

As soon as I accepted the book from her she dissipated into beautiful Polish/British dust. I proceeded to sit in the beautiful ski lodge by the fire and read the book she entrusted to me. Thanks to my photographic memory, I read it only once, then woke up from my dreamscape and transcribed it into a word file on MS DOS.

Pretty weird eh?

Deciphering Rula Lensca's Enigma Dream-Codes

Rula Lensca made this a lot harder than it needed to be. I have tried in great difficulty to decipher her enigma dream-codes for nearly 16 years. I have been going over my transcription of the text daily yet it has not made any sense to me...UNTIL RIGHT THIS VERY SECOND!

I understand the text now and I will try my best to explain it to whomever is reading this.

Firstly, I would like to give you a few examples of what I had to contend with over the last 16 years, I will present to you what was inscribed in the text and what it means...just to give you an idea of how "vague" her fuckin' "details" were.

Here is a prophecy from Chapter XII on identifying Aristocrats in the future (right now). It is a simple quatrain that I will then decipher for you... 

"Amongst several Aristocrats merged unto to the isles from the land of yester ole,

One to be born with the jowls of a manatee and the face of a six year old child even into adulthood, 

He will poison the land, strip the trees, and rob the people of their meager possessions, For them a new King issues a new edict of intolerable evil,
 
this man's name will be Steril Herpes."

(XII, III, 16-19)

It's vague and odd yet there's two things that really stand out. I have seen a face recently that has jowls of a manatee yet the rotund face of a six year old child, and this man is in a position of power. The final line in the quatrain is the one that really freaks me out though...Steril Herpes. I think Rula was close in her prophecy yet the name was slightly off.

Horrible jowl face, looks like a little kid...Steril Herpes...
What an odd looking creature...

Take out the r, i, l in Steril and the e, e, and s in Herpes and you're left with Ste Hrp. Rula Lensca's prophecy is about Canadian Prime Minister Steven Harper and I'm absolutely sure of it! She just got the name slightly wrong, that's all.

He is one of the "aristocrats" she speaks of, someone who never works and just feeds like a big googly-eyed jowled-up parasite off of real humans.

All these years I knew that thing wasn't a human, and now I finally have the proof! Look at his eyes! His eyes I tell you! Those are not the eyes of a human!

The next quatrain I will use to showcase her insane writing style is even harder to follow but please bear with me. It's rife with numerology and other dealings of the occult which make it more taxing to understand...

When the hidden door lurks nigh we musn't search the environs yet we must search in ourselves,

Take the Five-Points of the self and thus specify the darkest of those points, the first letter of this legendary hero's name added to the last,

The kabala sign of olden rights of passage must adhere to this late artist,

The stadt of the sum of the annal thus fortels the second of the evil ones ,

(X, IV, 36-39)

This is a real baffler. First I thought she was speaking of the wiccan pentagram with the "five points" business but she wasn't. After testing all (and I mean all) of the possible possibilities I figured that she was referring the the five points of Manhattan in New York. 

When I thought of the five points, I naturally thought of the old East-Side Kids/Bowery Boys movies starring Leo Gorcey. Then I fixated on the "darkest point" then I thought to myself "who was the black guy in the Bowery Boys movies?"
Scruno (left) with Bela Lugosi (right)

SCRUNO! The next clue was Scruno! Of course! Oh Rula, why must you speak in puzzles!? WHY!!?

He's not the answer just the clue to the answer, I had to add the "first letter to the last" as so...

S = 19th letter
O = 15th letter

19 + 15 = 34

Now take the X locator and Z locator from Kabala Numerology and we get 19 and 34...or the year 1934.

Which "artist" died in 1934? Cassius Marcellus Coolidge of course, the man who first painted dogs playing poker.
It is all so clear to me now....
"Stadt" is of course german for the word "city," and C.M. Coolidge was born in Antwerp, New York...yet she must have used the German word for city to foretell that it was not the Antwerp in New York to be concerned with yet the one in Europe. Antwerp is also a city in Belgium, and who was born in Belgium the same year that the guy who painted dogs playing poker died? The King of Belgium Albert II, of course!

The King of Belgium is an Aristocrat!

it's a little obvious Mr. King of Belgium...
I should have known that someone who claims to be a "king" in this day and age must be an aristocrat. I mean it's kind of obvious now that I think about it. Oh well, we can't all be as smart as Rula Lenska, I guess. There's so many aristocrats living amongst us that it is actually horrifying.

Rula's book sucks to read because it's so vague and annoying but when she gets down to the actual "divine stratagems" for giving aristocrats what they deserve, the book gets really interesting really fast.

She outlines very specific actions in order to sink each aristocrat's boat (so to speak) and tailor makes a divine stratagem for each individual aristocrat. As we shall see in the next section,



The "Divine Tripled-Pronged Fork Stratagem of the Volcano Sages"

I know of each divine stratagem inside and out like the back of my hand, yet we will only go over one example, and that's the stratagem for the first aristocrat mentioned in the above section...Mr. Steril Herpes (or Stephen Harper).

Rula refers to it as a "triple pronged fork" style stratagem and it's really brilliant when she gets down to it. She explains that forks were invented by the Chinese to gouge their own eyes out and eat them if they ever went blind, and then forks were used by Mongolian prisoners to escape from jails...and now today they are used as eating utensils. She says that the Chinese and the Mongolians knew the power a fork has, yet we humans of the modern age do not understand its power.
Danger! Get on the floor! Danger!

Rula teaches that each prong on a three-pronged fork is as dangerous as the prong next to it (and vice-versa), and together the prongs are more powerful than the sum of their parts.

The Three Prongs on Rula's "Divine Triple Pronged Fork Stratagem of the Volcano Sages" for giving Canadian aristocrats what they deserve are the following:

1. The Law is on your side
2. Strength in Human numbers
3. Immaculate Seduction of a Frigid Woman

Rula states that since the Canadian aristocrats own stock in the oil companies who are running an elaborate scam on Canadian people to feed off them, they are in a conflict of interest and should not be allowed to govern. She recommends any citizen who has been effected by the "gas scam" to file a class action law suit and sue the government for being in cahoots and owning stock in the oil companies. Any human or business who has been effected by soaring gas prices (while the oil companies and the aristocrats who own stock in those companies have made a ridiculous fortune) should add their name to the class action suit and with "strength in numbers" it can gain media attention and get off the ground.

Rula says a minimum of 333,333 people or businesses must add their name to the suit in order for it to work (don't ask how she arrived at that number but it took years of mathematical deduction and Bowery Boys numerology for me to decipher it). Also, it's a good idea to hold some sort of attention grabbing spectacle inspired by the "Boston Tea Party" but instead of tea they use oil. It's seems like a bad idea to dump oil into the water supply so I'd suggest dumping oil on aristocrat houses instead.

The last prong of the stratagem is by far the most important, Rula states in the text that if the class action lawsuit gains enough media coverage and momentum to make it to the Canadian Supreme Court that the judge will over rule it in a heart beat. That is the reason why the third prong is the key prong for success.

The third prong consists of sending a charismatic, Templeton Peck-esque, charming, man to seduce the Chief Canadian Justice on the Supreme Court in order to sway the verdict in the people's favor.

The "immaculate seduction" as it is referred is a very difficult maneuver. In fact it will have the last section devoted entirely to it...

The "Immaculate Seduction Prong" and the "Intrinsic Production of Human Dick-Heat" it Entails...

Scholars of the modern era know much about "aristocrats" it seems. I have a feeling others were visited in dreams by Rula Lenska including (but not limited to) Penn and/or Teller, Norm Macdonald, Jackie Martling, and of course Gilbert Gottfried as we see here telling a joke which pokes fun at aristocrats...

WARNING THIS JOKE IS OFFENSIVE AS.....OH MY GOODNESS....DON'T WATCH IT IF YOU ARE OFFENDED EASILY...


Yes, aristocrats are disgusting and awful people as evidenced in Gilbert's above joke. They are depraved and horrible people and this flaw is usually their weakness, but in the case of dismantling Canadian aristocracy...their depravity cannot be used against them.

Why? Because the Supreme Canadian Aristocrat is a frigid woman who never ever has sex. Thus, she will not easily be seduced during the "immaculate seduction."

The Ice Queen: The Supreme Aristocrat
The Chief Justice of Canada is known around town as the "Ice Queen" and is as frigid as a woman can ever possibly be. She is even more frigid than that horrible Judge Judy on network TV. The Ice Queen is Judge Judy times one hundred.

Human philosopher Mojo Nixon pondered what made Judge Judy so frigid in his brilliant piece, "What's up Judge Judy's Ass?" and he concluded that either as a kid she was beat, or she just wears shoes that are too tight for her feet. Either way, whatever turns a woman (specifically a judge woman) frigid is beside the point...what's important is how to figure out a way to seduce an ice queen.

Even if the most charismatic Templeton Peck type man was found to be sent to complete this incredibly difficult mission, Rula Lenska states in her tome that the chosen Peck would have to undergo training and read the appendix of the her tome. The appendix of the book is mainly a medical journal (of sorts) on how to do all kinds of awesome (and filthy) occult sex techniques.

The Appendix of her book tells of all sorts of things like how a female can focus her breathing so acutely that she can create a vortex vacuum in her stomach muscles that will turn her vagina inside-out and begin eating itself out. It tells of how a male can invert his wang into his own body and wrap it around the kundalini serpent that lives in his stomach and absorb the serpent's sexual energy. Most importantly, however, it has a technique it describes as the "Intrinsic Production of Human Dick-Heat" which is apparently necessary to employ if you want to make a cold woman hot.
Templeton Peck, a prime candidate for IPoHDH training

IPoHDH is achieved by channeling the ancient knowledge of the Volcano Men into your brain, then forcing all the heat energy in your body to transfer itself into the human wang. Next take two pads of 240-grit Sand Paper and rub vigorously about the wang until immense friction is created. Once you get used to channeling, transferring, and applying the sand paper rub down...you are ready to attempt to force the heat energy of your wang into triple overdrive which will overclock it's temperature to over 467 degrees (Fahrenheit).

A wang with a heat energy of between 467 and 500 degrees is powerful enough to melt an ice queen (whether it be Judge Judy or the Chief Justice of the Canadian Aristocracy). At least Rula Lenska thinks so anyway...

Once properly seduced, the Ice Queen shall rule in the people's favor (again, this is all based on speculation Rula Lenska wrote in a book she gave to me while I was dreaming back in 1996).

Conclusion

Was it a real dream...or something more real than a dream? I don't even know bro, I don't even know.

I might be crazy...or I might even be the SANEST PERSON ON EARTH.

I will never ever transcribe Rula's Tome for the internet for it would be too dangerous in the wrong hands, yet if you want to peruse the quatrains yourself in your own time then you can send me a self-addressed stamped envelope and include the reasons why you must have this tome...then I will send you a print-out free of charge, if I trust you.

If you are a foreign person, then please send appropriate shipping and handling fees in cash/money in your SASE for my shipping costs. It's not because I'm cheap though, I'll still send you the tome transcription if I trust you (to prove I'm not cheap)...BUT...I will cross off all the good parts and replace them with "CHEAPSKATE" to show you how cheap you are for not sending me the appropriate shipping and handling charges in your SASE.

(Note: If any Aristocrats are reading this, please don't worry...this is a humor blog...no one is after you.)